How to make friends in a new city:  Making new friends as an adult is hard, but not impossible

You’ve move to a new city found a great job and life is the sweetest it’s every been,  but there’s only one thing missing.  You don’t know anyone.

Many people move to new cities everyday.  Sometimes it’s for a job, or with a partner, or maybe even for school.  The best thing about moving is that it always feels like a new start, the bad thing about moving is also that it’s a new start.

Yes,  it’s good to have a new start in life and be in a new place with new opportunities, but that also means making new friends.

For most adults that’s a pretty hard thing to do.  Life isn’t’ like it was when we were younger.   Back then making new friends was like breathing air; it came really easy.  Now,  as adults,  it actually takes effort.  Most adults have a small circle of friends who they’ve had for a while and are not really looking to add anyone new.

So,  where does that leave you?

Don’t worry we have your back.  Here is a few ways to make new friends in a new city.

Use an App

Yep that’s what I said,  use an App!   So,  not to long ago I was introduced to an App called Meetup.  Now,  the first time I heard the name I thought that it must be a dating App,  but it isn’t.  MeetUp is a App for people like you looking to make new friends.

The app allows you to find other people who are interested in the same things you are.  For instance,  if you like writing,  you can find a writers meetup group.  Maybe you enjoy fitness.  There are meetups for that to.

So,  here’s were it gets better.

If you don’t see any meetups in your new city that interest you,  you can create your own.  The details of the meetup can be as specific as you like.  So,  you may want to meet up with women of a certain age range,  who love reading and brunch,  and who don’t like clubbing.

Yes,  you can be that detailed.

And don’t worry,  I would not recommend this app if I didn’t know people who have used the App before.  Not only did they use the app, but they’ve met and maintain great friendships with the people they’ve met.

Apps are great for any and everything.

Work

Work is a great place to make friendships that last.  Once you’ve started a new job and completed your training,  it’s now time to start getting to know people.  Many of us go to work and have nothing more than superficial relationships with our fellow coworkers.  But,  instead of going to work and going straight home, try inviting your coworkers to an outing.

Try asking a group of your coworkers to a sports bar to watch a game on the weekend or how about a happy hour on a Friday after a long work week.  It’s a great way to unwind and really get to know people.  You’ll find that when people are in a more relaxed setting they are less uptight and even fun.

After a few outings the people you don’t gel with will fall off,  but those that you do gel with will become great friends.  The work place is a wonderful option for making new friends.

Go to Events

Another way to make new friends is to be active and go to local events.  The next time you’re listening to the radio and you hear about an event that interest you, go!

Go to any event that interest you and once you’re there make small talk.   Mingle and converse with as many people as possible.  If you’re not really good at conversing find a spot to sit and people watch.  Eventually someone will take a seat next to you,  and when they do ask an open ended questions.  Like, how did you hear about this event?  What do you do?  Are there more events like this in town?

Just keep the conversation going.  You never know,  you may be talking to a potential new friend.

Follow up

These are just a few examples of ways to make friends in a new city.  The bottom line is that you have to be proactive in making friends.   Get out as often as you can and accept invites when given.  Make sure that you share contact information and try making an invite of your own.

The most important part of making new friends is follow up.  Don’t meet a potential friend and forget to call and keep in touch.  Remember be proactive.

Making new friends will only enhance your new life in a new city,  so enjoy the process and congrats on your new move.

photo credit: ibmphoto24 IBM introduces Spectrum Computing via photopin (license)