How to get over breakups: A short guide to getting over heartache.

Breakups are never easy.  No matter what the cause,  it’s always hard getting over someone you love.

I have had a few breakups in the past,  some worst than others,  but they’ve all hurt just the same.   I’ve learned valuable lessons from those breakups and I can now say that I am happy for the experience.

Past relationships, whether good or bad, taught me what I want in a relationship,  but most important what I don’t want in a relationship.  So,  I’m grateful for the experiences and today I’m stronger and wiser and capable of maintaining a great and loving relationship with my husband.

One of the many things that I learned along the way is how to get over those broken relationships with minimal hurt and baggage.   Sometimes we cause ourselves more hurt at the end of a relationship than necessary.

So,  I’ve decided to share what I’ve learned with you in this short guide to getting over a breakup.

Lesson #1  Loose the Pics

Loose all the old pictures of you and your ex having a great time together.  I know what you’re thinking.   Why should I do that?  They’re great memories,  right?

Wrong!

What they are is a constant reminder of your ex.  They’re a constant draw into thinking about your ex  and you don’t need that right now.  So loose the Pictures!

If you don’t want to throw them away that’s fine,  but put them away somewhere so that you won’t see them.  This includes pictures in your social media also.  I know it seems drastic,  but it’s a constant reminder and it has to go.

This leads me to lesson #2 which has to do with social media also.

Lesson#2  Cancel Social Media Friendships

Yes,  cancel friendships on social media.

So,  you’ve removed pictures from your phone and your home.  But,  what good is that if you’re still seeing your ex’s pictures on social media?  Listen,  I know this is hard,  but it’s necessary.  You may not want to see your ex having a great time without you.  You also don’t want to see them if they’re having a great time with someone else. (Weeding out Mr. Wrong)  This will only prolong the feelings of  hurt you’re having and it will also dredge up a new feeling.  Resentment!

You may not be ready to delete your ex as a social media friend and that’s fine.  Try unfollowing or blocking them for a short time,  just until you can come to grips with your feelings.

Lesson #3  No more communication

This is the biggest and hardest lesson of all.  It’s time to cut off communication with your ex.  I know it sounds harsh,  but it’s the only way you will move on.

We tend to want Closure.  Everyone I have ever come across when dealing with breakups want closure.  Myself included.  Once upon a time I needed to the how, the why, and the when.  But,  then I started to ask myself why do I feel like I need to know those things?

And do you know what I figured out?  There is never any explanation or excuse that is going to mend your broken heart.  No answer is a valid reason as to why this person betrayed or hurt you.  Thank God that you found out now rather than later and Let it go!

Lesson#4  Get out

Now’s not the time to sit at home.  Get out and do something.  Staying home without anything to do only creates time to think and guess what and who you’ll be thinking about.  That’s a big “No No.”

I don’t care if it’s out for a walk,  or a friend’s house,  shopping,  getting your hair cut, or whatever.   Just get out.

But,  focus on doing something that’s going to make you feel better about yourself.  I use to go to the spa anytime I wanted to take my mind off things and feel rejuvenated.  There’s nothing like a hot stone massage to chase the blues away and anything else for that matter.   Get up, Get out,  and go!

Lesson#5 Change your scenery

So,  there’s this place that you and your ex like to hang out and you still love it.  Well,  that’s all fine and dandy,  but how do you think you will feel seeing your ex bring someone else there?  Not good,  Not good at all.

Look,  it’s time for some new faces and new places.  Change your scenery!  Be adventurous and go somewhere new.  Who knows,  you may find someone new who can take your mind off of your ex for a while.

Grab a group of friends and go on an adventure to find new hangouts.  You may even find that you like your new hangout better than the old one.

Putting memories away,  cutting off communication,  getting out,  and a change of scenery are just a few steps to help you get over a breakup.  Mending a broken heart is never easy but there’s no need to make it harder than it should be.